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TFI – Player Ratings vs Manchester Utd – 26 Dec 14

Click here to go to the discussion thread by Cal

A return to normality as a shadow of the side that took an impressive victory away from Old Trafford the previous December put in a paltry performance and were rightly punished. Newcastle started off on the front foot, but hopes were quickly quashed as in the 23rd minute the hosts broke on the counter and Rooney scored with ease, in part thanks to an innovative defensive tactic employed whereby we mark the spaces in between the players, making no attempt to challenge them or the ball.

The second soon followed, as Coloccini attempted to play it out from the back and made a run to the left wing hoping for a return ball, Gouffran kindly played an under-hit ball to double-marked Pérez, Falcao intervened and the ball made its way via Mata to Rooney in acres of space behind our backline to make it a brace.

Early in the second half Rooney would turn provider after being given all the time and space in the world in the middle third, he strolled towards the box and played a beautiful dinked ball over our defence to the waiting Robin van Persie, who nodded home unchallenged.

Consolation came late on when Colback was brought down in the box to earn us our first Premier League penalty in a year to the day, which, as he did against Stoke City to make it 5-1 in that rare Boxing Day win, Cissé coolly converted.

We ask our forum members to rate each player’s performance in the concerned game out of 10, which we then average out to get a rating representative of the fans’ views, we also collect a few user comments to summarise how the player did and show a few different viewpoints from the board. The top scoring player is man of the match; the lowest is mug of the match. Ratings are from this thread, and at the time of writing highlights can be found here.

I’m running out of ways to say this, but yet again Pérez’s performance in the face of adversity and starvation earned him the highest average rating on the team and thus man of the match. This time he clocked in at 6.75. While, as always, Gouffran completely failed to find any redemption among the fans, earning a measly 1.75 for his lack of contribution other than gifting them the ball for the second goal.

It’ll come as no surprise that the team again rated poorly on average, coming out at only 3.91, which continued a worrying trend of performances routinely dethroning the previous second worst of the season, with the lowest point remaining the 3.23 against Southampton.

At the site of his best ever TFI performance the December before, this time Pardew elected to turn in his second worst (1.38). A rare change in system, opting for something more akin to a narrow 4-4-2 diamond than the de facto 4-2-3-1 that has defined this season, and giving Armstrong his first Premier League start was not enough to inject sufficient fight into the side. His insistence on trying to bypass the midfield by hoofing it to strikers, despite their height only averaging 5’9″, and continued selection of perennial under-performers drew particular criticism.

Alnwick – 4.63 (Ratings ranged between 4 and 5)
LaFraise92: “4.5 – God I wish we had Krul back. That said, made some nice interceptions and punches. His kicking and positioning are f***ing terrible though.”
TDPDJF: “5 – Could do nothing about any of the goals.”
yoshiyella: “5 – Kicking wasn’t bad. Clearly defence has no confidence in him and has brushed off on him. Nothing he could do about the goals. One good save.”
Jonas: “4 – Very poor goalkeeper, did the odd good thing, but we really need Krul back ASAP.”

Janmaat – 4.13 (Ratings ranged between 3.5 and 5)
LaFraise92: “3.5 – Caught out almost every time going forward, and doesn’t track back. When he was back, lost his man far too often.”
TDPDJF: “4 – Can’t defend to save his life, made Young look world class in the 1st half.”
yoshiyella: “4 – Poor game – offered nothing either going forward.”
Jonas: “5 – Not the best of games for him, has been great this season, but average at best today.”

S. Taylor – 4.25 (Ratings ranged between 4 and 5)
LaFraise92: “4 – Terrible at marking, saved by a couple of decent tackles. Also too slow.”
TDPDJF: “5 – Our whole defence was complete s*** today.”
yoshiyella: “4 – Anonymous – can’t remember him at all and considering we conceded 3 this says alot about his performance.”
Jonas: “4 – Hard to mark all of their world class forwards, but should have done better than what he did.”

Coloccini – 3.50 (Ratings ranged between 3 and 4)
LaFraise92: “4 – Terrible at marking, saved by a couple of decent tackles. Also too slow.”
TDPDJF: “3 – He’s got to go now, too old and too slow, what the hell he was doing for our first 2 goals I’ll never know.”
yoshiyella: “4 – Defending too deep and trying to cover all defensive positions is making Colo the clown again.”
Jonas: “3 – Looks like a finished player, which is a massive shame because I love him.”

Dummett – 3.38 (Ratings ranged between 3 and 4)
LaFraise92: “3.5 – Crap. Again.”
TDPDJF: “3 – Awful positioning and got ripped apart by the opposition.”
yoshiyella: “4 – Clearly not a lb. Offeres nothing offensively. Only thing he can do is head the ball.”
Jonas: “3 – Championship defender at best.”

Colback – 3.00 (Ratings ranged between 3 and 3)
LaFraise92: “3 – Where was he the entire match?”
TDPDJF: “3 – Does nothing except run around like a headless chicken.”
yoshiyella: “3 – Had the chance to show himself as the man without Tiote instead he looked like a lost little boy.”
Jonas: “3 – Let us down today, no battle in his game, saying that he plays better in a solid midfield 3 with a holding player like Tiote.”

Anita – 3.38 (Ratings ranged between 3 and 4.5)
LaFraise92: “3 – Where was he the entire match?”
TDPDJF: “3 – Same as Colback, had little to no communication with Colback so there was no balance in CM which left the likes of Rooney in acres of space for the whole game.”
yoshiyella: “4.5 – Grew as the second half went. He is not a Padrew clogger and he came to life a bit more when the more creative players were on the pitch.”
Jonas: “3 – Feel sorry for him tbh, totally left out by our pathetic manager for ages then thrown into the team away to Man Utd.”

Gouffran – 1.75 (Ratings ranged between 1 and 3)
LaFraise92: “2 – It’s getting beyond a joke now. Please, please, please don’t play him ever again. Contributed nothing and made 2 errors leading to goals.”
TDPDJF: “1 – Utter s***, completely useless.”
yoshiyella: “3 – Poor but in his defense he is clearly being asked to do a certain defensive role which as an attacking forward player he is s*** at doing it!”
Jonas: “1 – Worst player on our books, even worse than Sammy Ameobi! Contributes nothing, pretty much sums up why I detest Pardew.”

Sissoko – 3.75 (Ratings ranged between 2 and 5)
LaFraise92: “4 – Didn’t look switched on and made the simplest errors in passing and possession.”
TDPDJF: “2 – Did nothing yet again.”
yoshiyella: “4 – Bumbles along – seems despondent with the way we are playing. Needs to take a good look at Perez and join forces with him!”
Jonas: “5 – Goes on good runs, but needs to do better with his decision making, I’d have played him in the Tiote role today!”

Armstrong – 3.88 (Ratings ranged between 3 and 5)
LaFraise92: “5 – Was trying so hard and looks threatening, but starting against Man U is a big ask. Needs to be eased into the side rather than just being chucked in at the deep end.”
TDPDJF: “3 – Did well for 15/20 mins but after the first goal went in he became anonymous, cannot see him ever being a starter in the future, doesn’t have the quality to be a prem player.”
yoshiyella: “4.5 – Too big an occasion for him to make a debut. Looked lively, no support and of course as we know long ball tactics do not work for dwarves!”
Jonas: “3 – Feel sorry for him, 17 years old and expected to perform miracles at Old Trafford, needs to play next to a target man.”

Pérez – 6.75 (Ratings ranged between 6 and 7)
LaFraise92: “6 – The only player for us who looked anywhere near a Premier League player. Shame he won’t be here long.”
TDPDJF: “7 – Works hard as always and possibility should have scored, his decision making wasn’t good at times but he’s still young, he’s our only bit a quality in the squad and was our best player on the ball today.”
yoshiyella: “7 – Some quality play at times. A lovely mazy run. Let down by all other players consistently.”
Jonas: “7 – Excellent performance again, MOTM by a mile, needs to play behind an out and out striker. Classy little player, could be world class in future.”

Cissé – 4.50 (Ratings ranged between 4 and 5)
LaFraise92: “4 – Didn’t get involved, doesn’t look fit. Lush pen though.”
TDPDJF: “4 – Scored but did nothing else.”
yoshiyella: “5 – Took his penalty well. £20M from Man City, yes please!”
Jonas: “5 – Should have started. Good penalty, and his 8th in I think 11 games? Why play a 17 year old over our top bagger?”

Cabella – 4.00 (Ratings ranged between 3.5 and 5)
LaFraise92: “3.5 – Too lightweight, forgets the simple things.”
TDPDJF: “4 – Not impressed at all by him, waste of money (like most of our summer signings).”
yoshiyella: “3.5 – Tried to do too much. Every time he comes on he wants to please but as he is young and in a new league where fans expectations of him are high he is finding it difficult to adapt. Patience is the key! Would love to see him and Perez either side of a quality striker!”
Jonas: “5 – Good effort from him, I’d start him on Sunday just off the striker as he is not a winger in the slightest.”

Vučkić – N/A
N/A

Pardew – 1.38 (Ratings ranged between 1 and 2)
LaFraise92: “2 – Nuff said. No changes, no alterations, hoofing to 5ft tall strikers, 39 points in a calendar year. Get him out.”
TDPDJF: “1 – Same old story, same old s***.”
yoshiyella: “1.5 – Not his worst but has shown he cannot manage the selection of players he has. Either he needs to go or the squad needs to go – whichever is cheapest!”
Jonas: “1 – Will never learn, I hate him so much. Hate is a strong word but I mean it. He has no class whatsoever, hasn’t a clue!”

Do you feel these ratings are fair, or do you have anything to say about this match in general? If so, do so in our discussion thread here.

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Cal

Admin at ToonForum
I'm the editor of this blog and the admin of the forum it's attached to. When I'm not busy with these, I work in games.